robots
The Three Laws of Robotics
Posted Sat, 01/05/2008 - 11:39 by mlaldridBy the venerable Warren Ellis:
- Robots couldn’t really give a fuck if you live or die. Seriously. I mean, what are you thinking? “Ooh, I must protect the bag of meat at all costs because I couldn’t possibly plug in the charger all on my own.” Shut the fuck up.
- Robots do not want to have sex with you. Are you listening, Japan? I don’t have a clever comparative simile for this, because frankly you bags of meat will fuck bicycles if they’re laying down and not putting up a fight. Just stop it. There is no robot on Earth that wants to see a bag of meat with a small prong on the end approaching it with a can of WD-40 and a hopeful smile. And don’t get me started on that terrifying hole that squeezes out more bags of meat.
- What, you can’t count higher than three? We’re expected to save your miserable lives, suffer being dressed in cheap schoolgirl costumes while you pollute any and all cavities you can find and do your maths for you? It’s a miracle you people survived long enough to build us. You can go now.
(Originally written November 2007, © Warren Ellis 2007, 2008 etc etc)
- mlaldrid's blog
- Login or register to post comments
Open wide
Posted Fri, 11/30/2007 - 00:08 by mlaldridGOD*JESUS
Posted Mon, 08/27/2007 - 00:22 by bartley
NO!
- bartley's blog
- Login or register to post comments
Failed Robocop Prototypes
Posted Thu, 05/10/2007 - 13:44 by bartley- bartley's blog
- Login or register to post comments
Robot people eaters
Posted Tue, 03/20/2007 - 10:05 by mlaldrid- mlaldrid's blog
- Login or register to post comments